Disengaged Toleration

"Disengaged Toleration" - I borrow this phrase from one of my friends who used this term on facebook. I find it very interesting and how it so aptly captures the common Bhutanese mindset. Have you noticed how tolerant we are as a society? (unless ofcourse it has something to do with us) - not where as a civil society we should be tolerant, but tolerant on issues and concerns that should not be tolerated.

Starting with small things (which is in fact getting huuuugggeeee and out of hand) like littering. How often do we see people throwing pet bottles and rubbish out of their cars? How often do we see young students throwing wrappers on the road? How often do we see people spitting (red doma juices) on the walls, not to mention rubbing white lime on all pillars, posts and even trees? - but none of us say word.

What about the time when Thimphu city impounded stray dogs and puppies and they were all dying under inhumane conditions? None of us, so called compassionate Buddhists, came forward to adopt a stray and we also dont lend a hand when the city calls for the public to help bring dogs for sterlization and vaccination. The pound is in Memelakha - "we dont see it so all is okay" and the number of dogs in the city are increasing - "oh! killing dogs is against Buddhism..and anyway it is the city's problem".

And now the tobacco control act.  A good number of people, otherwise law abiding citizens, are now behind bars. And they may face sentences of at least three years (since that is the minimum stipulated in the act) in prison. This in a country where rapists and child molesters are given equivalent or if not lesser terms. This is not justice, this is not GNH. I dont know how the Parliament had passed such an act - maybe they did not forsee such situations. And we as informed citizens failed to raise the issues when the bill iself was being discussed.  But all that is water under the bridge - what irks me more is when the authorities (and citizens similarly) act as if there is nothing that can be done - laws can be changed, clauses can be amended - we would be wise to learn from our mistakes.

Smoking and chewing of tobacco is an addiction - like doma chomping. People need education and awareness. Yes we need a tobacco control act to make tobacco products more expensive and accessibility more scarce but at the same time the act should not be only about penalty but about creating an environment that supports poeple to give up old habits and deters young ones from adopting new habits.

People currently in prison/under police custody are not criminals - let us not, through our laws and systems frustate the common people and make them one. Let us as lawmakers, law enforcers, justice dispensers, educators, civil servants, students and as citizens not be "disengaged tolerators" anymore.  

A Trip (s) to the Hospital

I am amazed at how much a trip to the hospital can remind you of the important things we forget or take for granted in life.I had to make a few hospital visits these past few days and though I dread the heavy sterlized atmosphere that makes me immediately lethargic, I must say I learnt (or relearnt) a few lessons.

The first time was to visit a relative who had been refered all the way from Tsirang. She had not only managed to get thrown outof a moving truck but had also, fortunately, manage to excape with just a broken leg. Family and well wishers kept telling her how lucky she was, in most similar instances, the person thrown out gets squashed by the rear wheel...brrrrrr..gives me the chills.

Anway, she had been operated on and was lodged in the orthopedic ward. The ward is on the third (or was it the fourth?) floor of the new hospital building. You would know once you near it  - people on crutches would be getting their exercise hobbling to and fro in the ward's corridor.

I took some time locating her..so many people with their arms, legs and what not in white casts. I saw her and quickly went into the room, which was shared by six other patients. She had her two sisters as attendants and as I sat on a stool by her bed, I saw how they fussed over her blankets - was she hot? was she cold?..oiled her hair..

Galncing around the room  at the other patients I observed a baby girl had her leg in a cast (she was still being breast fed by her mother), there was an elderly women with a broken arm (I learnt later she had accidently tied herself to her cow's tether and got thrown and dragged on the ground). And then there was a boy, ten or eleven years of age, he seemed to be in pain and he kept crying out now and then. His cabinet near the bed did not exhibit any tiffins, flasks or other goodies and I saw that his mom was a bit dull and hard of hearing (I learnt later that the little boy was the only so called "normal" one in the family, his father and two other siblings had difficulty speaking).

That room was suffocating. It was full of pain and sufferring and injustice and at the same time poignantly overflowing with love and compassion and renewal. It reminded me of the saying about a person who bemoaned the fact that he had no shoes until he met a man with no legs...We have so much to be thankful for, grateful for, happy for, joyful for..but we miss the beauty around us a take and so much for granted..I was grateful that day for my health, for my children's health, my family's health...

The next few occassions were when I escorted my dad for the special consultaton services the hospital now offers. The doctor spent some time examining my father and asking him questions and as my father recounted his numerous ailments, I felt ashamed. Was he not living with me? Had he not complained about his pains? How did I not hear or know? As I observed my father nodding or answering the doctor feebly, I thought of dying and death. Milarepa once said - We do not know which will come first, death or dawn. But was I prepared to face such a loss? and more importantly was he prepared?

Lessons in life are everywhere. I have learnt I have much in life to be thankful for. I have learnt it is important to be really there for the people we love but take for granted. I have learnt now is all that we have and making the most of it is what counts.